The Super Adventures of Mr Man and Sidekick Bob
by Teh Future Mrs. Kyo Sohma
Summary: Mr. Man and Sidekick Bob enemies by day, insane super hero buddies by night! Follow the insanity as they attempt to save the world, in a way only they can. A Kyo and Yuki fic. NO YOAI. [Completed]
1. Illegal Spankings

**A/N:**

**Here it is. A series of tales, featuring Mr. Man and Sidekick Bob.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Fruits Basket.**

**Warnings: OOC, language and some sexual references.**

If you throw in a bit of 'once upon a time' and a teaspoon of 'in a far away land', you'd probably come up with a fairly decent fairytale. But, this was no fairytale. It was… something else.

Yuki and Kyo Sohma sat across from each other, staring daggers. But, when no one was looking, each cracked an awkward smile, before returning to the glaring. You see, the hatred is only something to hide the Cat and the Rat's secret alliance. An alliance, which they formed themselves, to rid the cities and streets of crime. Or at least loiterers and old ladies.

It was about 7pm at night, when they received the call from the mayor.

"Help, help, Sidekick Bob and Mr. Man! The main street is being attacked by crazy old woman! They are spanking people illegally! Without permits!"

"Gasp!" Cried Kyo, when he heard the news through the phone, "Without permits! How illegal and rude of them! Me and Mr. Man will be on our way!"

Kyo slipped into the closet and took off his bracelet. Dun dun dun! He jumped out, in a purple jumpsuit with red love hearts and a silver cape, exclaiming,

"Never fear, Sidekick Bob is here!"

With his orange hair stuck up in the original "Sideshow Bob" fashion, he exited the room quietly so no one would see him. He had to find Yuki…

"Yuki…" He whispered in the toilet bowl, "Yuki…"

"Yes, Sidekick Bob? Is there trouble?"

"Sure is, Mr. Man! Some evil old ladies are spanking people! With no permits!"

"Gasp! This sure is serious" Gasped Yuki, "I'll go transform! In the mean time, listen to this waiting music" Yuki said, while inserting a disc into a CD player which magically appeared behind him. Sidekick Bob listened, while Yuki transformed.

In the magical closet, Yuki took off his angsty face and smiled, which caused him to transform into the infamous Mr. Man. His green jumpsuit with orange stars, along with his black cape, really bought out the colour in his hair!

He stepped out of the closet and went to find Sidekick Bob, who was still gawking at the waiting music. Mr. Man tapped his shoulder.

"Come," He said in a manly voice, "We must rescue the people from the old hags. But first, we must make an escape from the house without the fellow inhabitants seeing us!"

"Stop talking so smartly," Replied Sidekick Bob in an even more manly voice, slapping his partner on the back, "There's no need!"

So then they jumped out the window and fell flat on their faces.

"Maybe we should have used the front door," Moaned Mr. Man angstly, rubbing his bottom in the process. Sidekick Bob nodded as they skipped into the town where people were in peril.

As they skipped down the winding roads which led them to their destination, they received odd looks from passers by.

"Are they for real?"

"Is that… PRINCE YUKI?"

"Is that… PRINCE KYO?" (In the manga, there is a Prince Kyo fanclub too. Refer to manga book 17, for more details…)

It seemed that everyone was in shock. Of course, because Mr. Man and Sidekick Bob were painfully oblivious, they thought everyone was waving and telling them how manly and strong they were. They waved back, blowing kisses.

Once the destination which was the destination which they were destined to be destinated upon, they set to work to defeat the old grannies who were spanking with out permits.

"You! Old hag!" Yelled Sidekick Bob at the top of his lungs, waving his hand, "Yoo hoo! Your spanking without a permit! That's very illegal of you!"

"And sexual!" Added Mr. Man, "Very sexual"

Mr. Man ran up to an old lady and attempted to attack her, but failed and tripped over her old granny walking stick. He cried out,

"Help, Sidekick Bob! For I am being held hostage to the old woman!"

"Excuse me, young boys, we were just out for a picnic with the old folks home and were asking some people to help us cross the street. Is there a problem-"

"THEY ARE TRYING TO BRAINWASH US!" Shrieked Sidekick Bob, running to Mr. Man's side and prodding him with his index finger intently.

"It'll be ok, Mr. Man! I'll attempt to rescue you!"

Sidekick Bob looked around in his tight, jumpsuit, pocket for something to use to attack the old granny who was looking inquisitively at Mr. Man, as he lay sprawled on the floor, shaking and mumbling about being held hostage and how he was going to die.

But then, Sidekick Bob needed to sneeze, so he got out his hanky and blew his nose. There was a lot of snot. But then, he had an idea! YES! AN IDEA!

"I will now attack you, old hag!" He cried, throwing the very snotty, and sparkly hanky at her, which promptly attached itself to her blouse and smeared yellow-ish goo all down the front of her.

"Yaaa!" She screamed and hobbled away with the other grannies. Sidekick Bob then poked Mr. Man and told him he was saved.

"Yay!" Mr. Man said happily, "Let's go eat sushi, then go home!"

"No, let's just go home"

"Okay"

So then, Mr. Man and Sidekick Bob skipped home, their job done.

But little did they know, an evil more evil than evil grannies was bestowing it's evil upon the non evil accepting town…

**A/N:**

**Well, how random was that? For dumbies…**

**Mr. Man Yuki.**

**Sidekick Bob Kyo!**

**Yes. Now, go on and review!**


	2. Dr Not So Evil

**A/N:**

**Chapter two, finally! Gawd!**

As I said before, an evil more evil than evil grannies was bestowing it's evil upon the non-evil accepting town… but the two super hero friends didn't know of it just of yet. Instead, they were tackling the task of eating breakfast and not choking to death.

"Gawd, you stupid cat! Eat like a pig, why don't you!" Yuki hollered.

"I would never act like Kagura!" Kyo bellowed in reply, flinging a sausage at Yuki's small head. It slapped him in the face, smearing greasy grease down his delicate complexion. Kyo mouthed an apology, before running away.

Yuki sat in silence for quite a while, Shigure and Tohru staring at his worriedly. He got up and followed his partner in defeating crime.

"Hey, nice throw"

"Huh!"

Kyo turned around on his heel to see Yuki smiling stupidly at him.

"I heard, Mr. Man, that evil is bestowing itself upon our non-evil accepting town, under the pen name of…"

"Yes, yes!" Kyo urged, flapping his arms around madly.

"A Sohma"

"A Sohma as in their first name starts with A and their last name is Sohma, or 'a Sohma' as in they are a Sohma"

"Their first name starts with A"

"GASP! AKITO!"

"No no… Akito is sick. Not only that, Tohru said that Sohma is a common name. It could be any random person"

The two cousins slash fighters in crime pondered. They drank some pondering juice AKA water. They wore their pondering hats AKA their school caps. They sang pondering songs AKA nursery rhymes. Basically, they did everything.

"I know who it might be," Kyo piped up after about 6 hours of sitting in dead silence, thinking. His face scrunched up in concentration, he muttered,

"Ayame…"

"OH MY GOD YOUR RIGHT!" Yelled Yuki, despite the fact his friend was within earshot. Kyo rubbed his ear before walking to Yuki's bed and sitting down.

"We must consult Ayame" Yuki said finally, rubbing his chin. Kyo nodded as they both went their separate ways to transform.

Mr. Man and Sidekick Bob took their leave, by walking down the stairs in broad daylight. They didn't want another ass hurting stunt. Shigure and Tohru gasped.

"Look, Tohru! The guys on the front of the newspaper! "Two idiots attack old women, but not charged as they seemed like drug addict teens"! Now they have come for us!"

Sidekick Bob shrugged, "I'm surprised your not dead yet" and Mr. Man secretly agreed. They walked off, leaving two slightly stunned friends alone.

"Come, Sidekick Bob," Mr. Man stated loudly, "We must break into Main House and speak with Ayame. You're a cat. Jump over the wall, then help me over, my sexy sidekick"

"Okay!"

Sidekick Bob then graced over the wall and onto the other side. He wondered how he was going to get Mr. Man over, but then realized, he could press the big red button and the gates would open. So, he did.

The two cousins slash super hero buddies trekked into the quiet estate, where the only noise was their loud and dramatic breathing. Finally, they reached the quarters where Ayame had been staying; his monthly visit to Hatori consisted of drinking tea and being locked in a room on the other side of the estate.

They hesitated, before opening the door, to find Ayame in a floral jumpsuit, with a green tutu. It was an ugly sight, as the colours did not match.

"God Ayame, you look butt ugly as ever," Said Sidekick Bob, choking on his own spit. Mr. Man also joined in the choking fest, gagging repetitively.

"I am not Ayame!" The man who wasn't Ayame but sure did look like him replied, "I am… DR. NOT SO EVIL!"

"Gasp!" Gasped Mr. Man and Sidekick Bob together, staring with their mouthed wide open.

"You must be the evil that is descending upon our non evil accepting town" Sighed Mr. Man finally, rubbing the back of his neck and sweat dropping. He night have been a famous super hero, but who knew that his arch nemesis for the chapter (and probably the rest to come as well) would be his own brother? He took out a can of spray paint from his pocket sash.

"Gasp!" Hollered Dr. Not So Evil, "How did you obtain that, dearest Mr. Man? You have to be 18 and over, do you not? Your only 17!"

"I have a fake id. So does Sidekick Bob. We both need them to get our super hero crime fighting supplies. We wouldn't be allowed if it wasn't for these"

"Yeah. Lets take a quick moment to thank the gangsta's of Japan"

The three cousins stood quietly as they secretly thanked the gangsta's.

"AH HUH!" Yelled Dr. Not So Evil, "I just grabbed your fake id's! Now how super hero like are you?"

"Oh no!" Wailed Sidekick Bob, "We're all gonna die!"

"No we wont" Said Mr. Man, "We've all been standing here for about 20 minutes, so I'm sure this is something a little convincing could help. We will have to fight him with some spray paint, a can of baked beans and our wits"

"I have no wits!" Cried Sidekick Bob.

Mr. Man rolled his eyes and damned Sidekick Bob, before they huddled in a corner. Dr. Not So Evil was still laughing about how he stole their fake id's.

"Ok Sidekick Bob, you eat this tin of baked beans and fart all over him. Then, I will cover him in this purple spray paint. This should stop him from being able to see properly. If I aim right, of course. Then, we can bad mouth him, until he gives us our id's back"

"Yay!"

So they put the plan to action. Sidekick Bob began to eat the baked beans, with his magical spoon. Yummeh. Once the task was complete, they set out to explode Sidekick Bob everywhere.

"Have a present," Sidekick Bob said to Dr. Not So Evil.

"Present! Yay!"

"FART!" Sidekick Bob and Mr. Man hollered, as Sidekick Bob let out the deadly gas. Mr. Man sprayed the purple spray paint and Dr. Not So Evil cried.

"The truth…" He mumbled, "I am your… father"

"NOOO!"

"Okay, I lied. I'm your brother!"

"Gasp! Now I will always hate you!"

Sidekick Bob and Mr. Man grasped their id's and ran away, leaving Dr. Not So Evil in a heap of not so evil stuff.

Once their job was done, they went home to sleep and be ready for the next day. Because, Dr. Not So Evil had a lot of co-workers. A lot of people on his side.

And one was MOO-ving himself in for the kill!

**A/N:**

**Damn! I wrote another chapter. I like the last sentence.**

**It's sexy.**


	3. The Milk Man and his Evil Plan

**A/N:**

**Yesh. It's Friday, which means I am updating EVERY STORY I have, because I can stay up late to do them all. This is only my second. Sheesh…**

Yuki was quietly and calmly doing his homework one Saturday afternoon in May, when Kyo came thumping down the stairs. They had their own secret language, which signified when they needed to speak in private.

"I THINK IT'S TIME YOU WENT TO THE TOILET" Kyo stated flatly and loudly, staring and Yuki's homework in the process. He then realized it would save him a lot of work if he just remembered the answers and copied them. Pleased with himself, he went to wait for Yuki in the Man-Bob Lair.

The Man-Bob Lair was actually just a large cupboard under the stairs, with a light inside, a desk and two chairs. It was where they secretly discussed secret matters of secrecy.

"Yes, Kyo?"

Kyo turned away from the wall he was staring at to find Yuki sitting in the opposite chair. They were both as equally scrunched up as each other, seeing as they were almost fully grown and could barely fit. Kyo smiled and replied.

"I have news from the Mayor that a new villain is attacking and that we should be on the look out for anything suspicious, loud or terrorizing" Kyo said. Yuki gave him a funny look.

"That's something to be happy about? Gawd, Kyo. Anyway, did the Mayor describe the looks of this new villain?"

"He said that he worked for Dr. Not So Evil and that he had black and white hair. He also said that he often seems calm and then can just attack at random. He's wearing a black and white jumpsuit with a purple floral cape. That should be easy to spot in a crowd…" Kyo pondered whilst rubbing his chin and squinting his eyes in the proper thinking fashion. Yuki nodded.

"Okay. Lets transform and go on look out"

The squeezed themselves out of the Man-Bob Lair and went their separate ways, only to meet again less than a minute later, fully transformed and wearing the appropriate super hero-like clothing.

"Sidekick Bob, your spandex is wearing out!" Gasped Mr. Man, pointing at the stretched piece of purple fabric. Sidekick Bob waved his hand.

"Don't matter. I'll take it to your brother some time"

"But he's Dr. Not So Evil!"

"Only when he's in uniform" Sidekick Bob corrected, tugging on his leader's jumpsuit, "Come. We must fight villains"

"Okay, but this villain sounds like-"

Mr. Man was cut short by a mooing noise downstairs. Tohru and Shigure both screamed. Mr. Man and Sidekick Bob gasped, before running down the stairs and into the eating area of the house. There, standing before them, was their villain!

"Bwahahaha! I am one of Dr. Not So Evil's followers!"

"Who are you?" Bellowed Yuki in a very sexy and manly manor, "I demand you tell me at once!"

"Me? Oh, I'm your worst nightmare! My super villain name is… is…"

"Yes, yes!" Sidekick Bob urged.

"THE MILK MAN!"

"Gasp!" Gasped Mr. Man and Sidekick Bob at the same time.

"Why?" Asked Sidekick Bob.

"Because… I am part cow! View my udders and become milked!"

The Milk Man pulled some fake udders out of his jumpsuit and walked into the kitchen, before pouring some milk into them. You see, The Milk Man was a boy, so technically, he had no udders. Sighing, he walked back into the room, milked up.

Tohru and Shigure lay forgotten in the corner, as Mr. Man and Sidekick Bob were sprayed with milk. They both fell, sprawled in a heap, crying. The Milk Man laughed.

"Haha! I win! Give me all your babes!"

"NEVER!" Cried Mr. Man, for he had a plan. In his pocket, he had some chewing gum. So, he bought it out and chewed on it. Sidekick Bob, still dying, looked over.

"What are you doing?" He whispered quite loudly.

"You'll see"

Mr. Man stood up and struggled, (as he was dying), across the floor towards The Milk Man. He stared down at Mr. Man in disgust.

"Moo!" He said.

Mr. Man coughed up the gum and broke it into four pieces, before blocking up The Milk Man's udders. The Milk Man cried and fell over, just as his fake udders exploded, milk going all over his face.

All of a sudden, Sidekick Bob wasn't dying anymore. He said yay.

The two crime fighters stood over The Milk Man and glared at him with their evil looking eyes, before shoving him out the front door and onto the curb. The Milk Man had officially lost the right to live in a house, as far as anyone was concerned.

Then, the two transformed back into Yuki and Kyo. They went over to Shigure and Tohru, who were fast asleep in a heap. They grinned before slapping them with cold turkeys.

"Oh my god. I am being slapped with a cold turkey" Said Shigure.

Everyone laughed and went to bed, then.

BUT! Back in the Not-So-Evil Lair, things weren't going as smooth.

"Dammit, The Milk Man! How could you do this to me? I mean, you're very sexy with your black and white fetish but… you failed!"

"Sorry sir"

"Nope, sorry isn't good enough. I'm sending in someone else. Someone new. Someone… who will go _APE _over the idea"

**A/N:**

**Pun, pun, pun! "Ape over the idea" is supposed to hint who is going next. Do you get it? I hope so…**


	4. Sir Ape a Lot

**A/N:**

**I slap you with a cold turkey.**

Yuki had just finished trying to get the TV to work when Kyo waltzed into the room unaccepted with a letter from someone who they didn't know.

Kyo thrust it towards Yuki and asked him to read it, as he couldn't.

"Dear Mr. Man and Sidekick Bob,

Prepare to… die! I am very sorry to have to send this letter to you, telling you so, but your death is coming! Sorry! I am the new villain in town! Sorry, again,

Sir Ape-a-Lot"

"Sir Ape-a-Lot, eh?" Kyo questioned, staring at Yuki like a piece of horsemeat, "That settles it. I'm going to go buy a tool that will help us defeat this weirdo"

"Don't forget your fake id!" Called Yuki.

"I don't need it. This thing's… free!"

"GASP!"

Yuki waited at Kyo trekked down to the store. On the way back, he was confronted by a man in a banana suit. Kyo wondered weather this guy was insane.

"I am Sir Ape-a-Lot. I'm sorry… give me your m-money!"

Kyo gasped. He needed to transform, and fast! So, he used his special pocket-sized torch to shine the magical symbol into the sky, the symbol which symbolized Mr. Man and Sidekick Bob. He just hoped Yuki was outside at the time.

Yuki gasped as he noticed a used condom in the sky. He knew that Kyo was in trouble, so he transformed and went to the rescue. When he turned up, the threw a magical towel at Kyo which allowed for him to transform in public, without his doo-hickey being shown. Or, so they thought.

Once they were transformed, the pair went to questioning Sir Ape-a-Lot.

"So, you work for Dr. Not So Evil, huh? That's smart of you, huh? Not really! Now, stop being evil, or we will have to use some form of force!" Kyo threatened shaking a very threatening fist.

"OH I'M SO SORRY, FORGIVE ME, I AM A MENACE TO THE WORLD! I HAVE RAPED MANY CHILDREN IN MY FIGHT FOR POWER! I HAVE LET MY SUPER VILLIAN POWERS CONSUME ME! FORGIVE ME! FORGIVE ME, EVERYONE! I'M SO VERY, VERY SORRY! DR. NOT SO EVIL! I'M SORR FOR LETTING YOU DOWN! EVERONE! I'M SORRY FOR MAKING A FUSS! I'M SO TERRIBLEY- Ooh, banana!"

Sir Ape-a-Lot goggled at the banana, which Sidekick Bob was currently holding up. He smirked and threw the banana on to the curb, where Sir Ape-a-Lot sat down and began to munch on it.

"Wow! Who ever knew that a banana could save the town?" Exclaimed Mr. Man, wide eyed.

"Me. That's why I bought the damn thing. Ape's like banana's. Sir Ape-a-Lot's name gave away the fact he was half monkey or ape, which he liked banana's"

"Very smart of you!" Cried Mr. Man, clapping, "our the best sidekick ever!"

"Thankyou!"

The two then made their way to an ice cream parlor, where they indulged themselves for doing such a good job. Well, Sidekick Bob, anyway.

That night, in the Man-Bob Lair, they discussed the fact that they needed a theme song. Mr. Man became the one to be praised, when he wrote this.

"When there's trouble you know who to call…

Mr. Man and Sidekick Bob!

From their Man-Bob Lair they can't see at all…

Mr. Man and Sidekick Bob!

When the city is under attack,

And the streets are filled with maniacs,

All you have to doo-oo-oo-oo….

Is call…

M.R. M.A.N AND S.I.D.E.K.I.C.K B.O.B!

Now available for birthday parties, hen nights and strip shows"

"That's so good, Mr. Man! Well done!" Sidekick Bob praised, while the two transformed back to normal, falling asleep in the Man-Bob Lair.

BUT! Back in the Not So Evil Lair…

"Damn you, Sir Ape-a-Lot! A banana distracted you! An effing banana! Well, that's the end of you. I have someone much better to take your place. Someone so powerful, no one can escape his logical words…"

**A/N:**

**Ha. I hope you understand who the next person might be.**

**That was Ritsu, if you didn't know and The Milk Man was Haru.**


	5. Big Mouth and Logicala! Oh no!

**A/N:**

**Is Friday your favourite do? It better be, because it's…**

**UPDATES FRIDAY!**

**The looks of "Big Mouth" are trademarked to "Fade To Black" and her character Hiro the Emo Superhero. **

Kyo Sohma had just finished helping Tohru make breakfast when Yuki Sohma ran down the stairs. He looked extremely sexy, but the most important thing was, he looked worried. Kyo turned to him and raised an eyebrow, which secretly asked, "What?"

Yuki motioned for Kyo to follow him into the Man-Bob lair. He nodded and explained to Tohru he suddenly needed to… go somewhere.

"Yes, Yuki?"

"The phone. The mayor is on the phone"

Kyo picked up the phone and listened intently for the mayor's voice. There was no sound, so he turned to Yuki, who shrugged and walked off. After about 15 minutes, Kyo said,

"Hello?"

"Oh, finally Sidekick Bob! The town has had news that an evil villain called Big Mouth has started invading random places and bad mouthing people's Mumma's behind their backs! It's going to be Mr. Man and yourself that save the day, of course, but I have a new person for the force, who will assist you only when you need it. Which is now. His name is Logicala "

"Okay, gotcha" Replied Kyo, hanging up and transforming, to go meet Mr. Man in the hallway.

"Mr. Man, I have a sneaky suspicion that this _Logicala _boy is up to no good"

"No, everything will be fine Sidekick Bob. Now, lets go kill Big Mouth!"

"Not kill, that's wrong"

"Okay, whatever"

On the way to town, a man with the looks of Hatori's other form confronted them.

"Hello, superhero friends. Lets go defeat this random"

"You must be Logicala. Lets go!"

"But wait," Interrupted Mr. Man, "What superhero powers do you have?"

"My logic has been known to send people to sleep for 20 years"

"Ooh, that super" Said Sidekick Bob, to the man before him, wearing a white jumpsuit with a blue question mark on it, "Hey! You don't have a cape!"

"I can't fly…" Replied Logicala sadly, "But neither can you!"

The three shrugged and wandered off into the town to find this so called, "Big Mouth" and defeat the living crap out of his super villain ass.

Once in the town square, they saw a small boy, wearing all black. He had about 60 pounds of eyeliner on his face and looked quite angsty. This didn't look like a big shot super villain at all!

"Excuse me," Politely asked Logicala, "Are you Big Mouth?"

"WHATS IT TO YA, GRANDPA?" Asked the little boy nastily, poking his tongue out.

"Yep, that's him," Sighed Sidekick Bob, reaching for his magical twig. He was going to do some serious ass poking today. He wanted to save the world! Sidekick Bob ran up to Big Mouth and attempted to poke him, but was attacked with some ferocious words.

"You Mumma's so fat, every time she turns around it's her birthday! Your Puppa's so old, his semen comes out as powder! Your Mumma's so stupid, she thought 1 plus 1 meant 11!"

Sidekick Bob fell into the fetal position, chanting, "Not my Mumma, not my Puppa" over and over again. Mr. Man gasped and attempted to take him down with a mixture of chewing gum and hair products, but got smothered in thick, gooey eyeliner. It was now up to Logicala, to save the day. But what was he to do?

Sighing, he stood up tall and attacked Big Mouth with some fierce words of his own.

"If E MC2, then what was F equal? If a dog ran 50.338 miles in a weekend and at the end of the weekend he had run 95.483029 miles, do you include Friday into the weekend? If it was Tuesday when the woman got pregnant and 9 months later she gave birth, what day was it?"

Logicala then took a breath. He was trying to think of things more complicated. But, he didn't need to. With the help of his words, Sidekick Bob's magical twig and Mr. Man's mixture, Big Mouth was left as a crying little boy.

Their job done, the hero's went their separate ways, only to meet up again 5 seconds later.

"Good job, Kyo" Said Yuki that night in the Man-Bob Lair, "Your twig really made all the difference"

"On contraire, I could say that about your chewing gum and hair product mixture! I mean, that's quite fancy"

The cousins laughed about that day and how they met Logicala.

BUT! In the Not So Evil Lair, The Milk Man, Dr. Not So Evil and Sir Ape-A-Lot sat down bitterly. The week had not gone well, for super villains.

"Dammit, I told you to turn Logicala evil, not that stupid little emo punk!" The Milk Man yelled, slamming his fist on the table.

"Don't worry boys, hopefully this new person will be the end of those stupid superhero's! Mr. Man and Sidekick Bob wont be able to escape her cuteness!"

**A/N:**

**Ooh, scary! Who is this new person? What ever happened to Logicala?**

**Who knows? **


	6. Miss Spirits, Beer Maid of EVIL DOOM

**A/N:**

**I hope you're happy. I updated just for you. Yes, you! Not anyone else reading this at the same time, no, no way… now read!**

**-Coughs up lungs-**

Yuki had had a restless sleep that night after defeating Big Mouth. For some reason, he could sense some sot of evil lurking around. It was almost like he would have to do a midnight job. Maybe another super villain was on the loose!

"Mr. Man… I have come for… for you!" Came a voice, from beside Yuki. He shot up like a lightning bolt, only to have no one there. Sighing, he went to back to his comfortable spot. Maybe all this crime fighting was going to his head.

"Don't resist… temptation! I am the one who will bring an end to Mr. Man and Sidekick Bob!" Hissed the voice, "Give yourself to me!"

Yuki sat up and looked around hesitantly, before mumbling something incoherent to the shadows of his bedroom. Suddenly, the voice started chanting. "Give yourself to me!" it repeated, over and over again. Then, there was a wisp of wind and the voice was gone.

In Kyo's bedroom the same sort of thing was happening to him, too. Lying in his bed, restless, a voice came to him from his right side. He turned over, expecting to see someone there, but he did not. Only a voice.

"Sidekick Bob… I have come for you! Don't resist me! I will be the bringer of the end for Mr. Man and Sidekick Bob, forever!" There was a pause, "Give yourself to me!"

Kyo squinted. One of the amazing superhero powers he had, was he could see ghosts. He was a cat after all, right? He noticed the outline of a spirit in his bed beside him, snuggled up inside the blankets. He mumbled before shifting away from the spirit. He didn't want cooties.

"Whaddaya want?" He questioned coolly, waving his hand through the spirits body. It shifted before opening a set of gleaming gold eyes that stared practically straight through him.

"Give yourself to me," Said the ghost, before disappearing into the night.

In the morning, Yuki and Kyo met in the Man-Bob Lair. It was an odd time, since they both had the same thing to say, but didn't realize it.

"Kyo… last night I heard a-"

"Voice? I know, me too. Except, with my smecksy ghost seeing powers, I saw it! I saw the spirit, Yuki! And guess what? I think I know who is after us!"

The two transformed before discussing it more.

"Well, it seems Dr. Not So Evil is turning all the Sohma's into villains, one by one. Who has golden eyes, except Ayame himself?"

"Why, it would have to be-"

Kyo nodded as Yuki covered his mouth and gasped.

"Who knew he would become so desperate as to use her?"

"I didn't. I hoped he wouldn't, but hey, kicking some ass wont hurt"

Yuki agreed. They tip-toed out of the cupboard under the stairs and into the hall way, where they ran out the door before being seen.

So far, they hadn't seen the Not So Evil Lair and they probably never would, so what I waste of time saying this was.

Mr. Man and Sidekick Bob walked slowly until Sidekick Bob halted, raising him arm so Mr. Man couldn't walk any further.

"What is it?"

"Hush… I see something in the air"

Indeed, there was a mysterious wave coming about the air. It seemed to be thicker and moister. Not only that, there was an unusual blurring near a tree.

"Hey, I can see you!" Sidekick Bob called to the blur. It opened one of it's freaky eyes and glared at him. Mr. Man gasped. Never in his life had he seen something like this before.

"Prepare to meet your doom, super… bimbo's!"

"BIMBO'S! HOW COULD YOU SAY THAT? BASTARD!" Sidekick Bob was pissed. He didn't care that this certain ghost happened to be his younger, girly, cousin, but she had to learn not to call him a bimbo. I mean really, his hair was ginger, dammit!

He pulled out his magical twig and prepared it for spiritual battle. The ghost girl sighed.

"Kyo, have you not learnt twigs cannot hurt ghosts? I mean really… I _am_ Miss Spirits, Princess of the Ghosts! You cannot harm me, without a fight with my spiritual friends!"

"You can't just utter his name in public like that, Kisa!"

"NOR CAN YOU UTTER MINE!" Miss Spirits bellowed, raising her glowering hands and throwing random souls towards our sexy, superhero friends. They ducked and dodged, but both got hit a few times.

"Look, Miss Spirits, I have a question for ya," Said Sidekick Bob quite coolly for him. Maybe he was trying to be cool. "Are you 'Miss Spirits' as in, beer, wine and spirits? Or spirits as in… ghosts?"

"Both," She answered casually, running a hand through her ghostly hands, "Dr. Not So Evil intended to have me a beer maid for his lair, hence the name "Miss Spirits", but the potion mixture came out wrong and made me come out like this! A spirit, myself"

Sidekick Bob gasped. He had a plan! He whispered it to Mr. Man, who agreed that it was a great idea. They enforced it.

"W-What are you doing?" Stammered Miss Spirits, as she realized she was being closed in on. Sidekick Bob whipped out a straw and showed it to her. She gasped.

"How did you-"

"Know? Simple, my ghostly cousin. Obviously, to be a beer maid, you need to have an endless supply of liquor, ne? Well, seeing as your name is 'Miss Spirits' and that the potion stuffed up, I guess your whole body was made of liquor. Ready to get trashed, Mr. Man?"

"Ready as I will ever be!" Cried Mr. Man, slamming a straw into her body and sucking hard. Sidekick Bob did the same thing, grinning the whole time. What a good idea he had had!

Once they had finished sucking, Miss Spirits was just a puddle of stale liquor on the ground. She hissed as her liquid body sunk into the dirt, emitting a soul, which flew straight to the Not So Evil Lair.

They laughed before transforming back and walking the 10 feet to Shigure's hosue, where they settled down in the Man-Bob Lair.

"That was some nice thinking, friend" Yuki said eventually, grinning.

"Yeah, thanks" Kyo replied, sighing.

It was still only 2pm in the afternoon, so they decided to go… bowling.

BUT! Back in the Not So Evil Lair!

"Damn you, Miss Spirits! How could you let the secret slip?" Questioned Dr. Not SO Evil angrily to his spiritual sidekick. She shrugged her thinned out body.

"You weren't even as cute as I had planned to make you, Kisa! H-How? Why did this have to happen? This is so useless! At this rate, we'll never win!"

"Ah, but think back, sir. We still have quite a good man up our sleeves. The fast one. The hypo one. The one who's half a rabbit so likes to multiply with anything that moves!"

He gasped, "By Jove your right! Okay, lets get this bunny on the streets!"

**A/N:**

**Yes, well…. Reviews please. **


	7. Mr Bunnikins, GASP!

**A/N:**

**Speak of the retardedness! It's UPDATES FRIDAY!**

**Spank yourself with joy, damn you…**

Kyo and Yuki were sitting in the Man-Bob Lair late one afternoon, after an eventful day at school. They learned about where babies come from, a very special lesson, which sexy superheros need to learn. During this lesson, Yuki and Kyo discussed it quietly.

"You mean… I don't have one of those pointy things?"

"Yeah, you do. You don't have the floppy skin things"

"…"

"What? It's true"

But now that time was over and the world was at peril again. Well, as peril-sum as a world can get that can be defeated with two strange superheros such as the ones on our hands at this moment in time.

"So…" Kyo said suddenly, after a while of thumb twiddling and silence. Yuki looked over at him and cocked his head, signally to continue. "I heard the world was in peril again"

"AGAIN! Gawd, how many times can the world be in peril in a week? What news do you have on the criminal?"

Kyo shrugged, so Yuki called the Mayor. Surely, he'd know something. The phone rang stupidly, so when the Mayor answered, Yuki was happy.

"Mr. Mayor, what news do you have on this new peril maker?"

"He's very young looking… blonde hair… rabbit ears… rabbit costume… big dick… sharp teeth… German accent… likes candy… and to have sex. His name is 'Mr. Bunnikins'! Beware!"

The Mayor hung up then, but Yuki kept on the phone until Kyo told him that no one was on the other side. He grinned in a silly manor.

"Mr. Bunnikins," Yuki said, quite satisfied with the villain names those people were coming up with. Kyo nodded and went to transform, along with his bestest buddy Yuki.

Mr. Man lunged out of the fridge and onto the table, where he raised a flag and held a hand to his chest. Sidekick Bob fell out of the bath tub and scampered downstairs to join him.

"MR. MAN AND SIDEKICK BOB VOW TO BE KIND TO EVERYONE EXCEPT EACH OTHER ON SOME OCCASIONS BECAUSE WE HAVE TO PRETEND TO BE BAD TO EACH OTHER OK? WE ALSO WILL BE SLIGHTLY MEAN TO VILLAINS"

Kyo nodded it utter agreement, before clapping his hands and pointing to the door. They strolled out and into the town square here they were confronted by a lady.

"There… the boy… rapes… blonde… bunny suit… big dick…"

"By Jove!" Exclaimed Yuki, "She's talking like the mayor! Maybe he rapes people into becoming stupid… or something!"

"Oh my god your right!"

They ran into the square were they saw the smallest boy they had ever seen, in a bunny sit, randomly grabbing people off the street (all genders) and raping them.

"DIE!" Sidekick Bob yelled, whipping out his magical twig. Yuki made a hairspray and bubblegum mix and threw it at the rabbit boy.

"Ja!" He yelled at them, "What? Please, leave! I am trying to be a naughty boy! Goodbye!"

The superhero's stared at each other. One thing was on their minds; MOMIJI. It was painfully obvious, seeing as Momiji wouldn't usually hurt a fly, which is why he was saying please.

Sidekick Bob threw his twig at Mr. Bunnikins, who turned around and hissed, before lunging at the cat and trying to find his juicy ass. Sidekick Bob screamed, be didn't want Mr. Bunnikins to claim his virginity.

Mr. Man gasped and ran to his aid by kicking the rabbit boy in the head. He started to cry.

"Waaah! Somebody! Mr. Man kicked me in the head!" He got up and ran away randomly, which made Sidekick Bob laugh, even though he almost got raped. Mr. Man grinned and helped his friend up, before pulling him into a bush, where they transformed back.

"So…" Muttered Kyo sourly, rubbing his ass. Mr. Bunnikins really hurt it, which his aiming and not getting it in the right place. (I'm a pervo).

"Lets go home. It's late now anyway, or getting to it" Yuki said softly, before leading the two home and into the Man-Bob Lair, where they both fell asleep.

BUT! Back in the Not So Evil Lair!

Dr. Not So Evil was really getting pissed with the way his minions were working. Of course, he still had a master plan, which would come last, because it was so evil. But! What was he to do now? He hardly had any Sohma's left, only a few strange ones. He still had a lot of chemical X left… maybe he could infect someone else. Like… Tohru, say. Or maybe…

"I have an idea," He told Big Mouth randomly, "But I need your help"

"Yeah?"

"Those strange girls who follow my precious Yuki and that weirdo Kyo… I think they could come in handy…"

**A/N:**

**Dun dun dun! NOT THE PRINCE YUKI FAN CLUB AND THE PRINCE KYO FAN CLUB! **

**Anything but them!**


	8. Oh damn, the fanclub girls! Ahhh!

**A/N:**

**Updating, finally! **

Kyo took a swig of his milk. Yuki was babbling about something strange that was going on with his fanclub girls. Kyo groaned; Yuki really needed to add some excitement to his voice, or something.

It was cold in the Man-Bob Lair, which wasn't surprising; it WAS winter, after all. As Yuki spoke about the strange goings on, Kyo considered that maybe his fanclub was also acting strange.

"…Which means that something must have happened!" Concluded Yuki, after a seven hour speech about his fanclub. Kyo nodded once.

"But does that mean the same for me, too?"

"Possibly," Yuki sighed, scratching his buttocks with sheer force. Maybe he had worms?

"Well," Kyo mumbled, "Time to go to school, anyway. I suppose I'll have to see if any man-eating women attack me. Doubt it, though. I think you're just an idiot,"

"Gee, thanks" Yuki said sarcastically as they entered the kitchen. "What a nice compliment,"

"Oh, wow!" Tohru grinned, "You two are getting along, finally!"

Kyo and Yuki exchanged worried glances. How would they put her off, for a while? Yuki obviously knew, because he shoved Kyo over and mumbled something random. Kyo also mumbled, because mumbling was fun.

At school, Kyo was looking out for his fanclub girls. Yuki was also on the look out, even though he already believed they were man-eaters. Suddenly, a loud noise was heard from behind him.

"Fuck!" Yelled Kyo, even though he's not supposed to swear in this fic, "Kagura!" He took a turn into a random classroom and locked it. Little did he know, the man-eating fanclub girls were outside, jumping meters to open the windows; they were sure determined!

It wasn't long before someone was knocking at the door of classroom. Kyo hesitantly opened the door only to be attacked by Yuki.

"What the hell?" He asked in quite a dignified manor.

"Let me in, stupid. The fanclub girls…"

"YA DIDN'T HAVE TA MURDER ME!"

"Your still alive."

"…Right"

Yuki walked to the window and pointed. "Look! They're outside trying to get in from the window. I told you! I told you something was weird about them. I mean, the fangs and super villain costumes… I couldn't put my finger on it at that point! But the man-eating. That's what set it off"

"Have you ever seen them eat someone?" Kyo asked as they both went into separate corners to transform.

"Yes, I have! That strange boy who's always talking to me… they ate him for being near me,"

Sidekick Bob nodded as Mr. Man was putting his cape on. It was lucky they transformed when they did, as the fanclub girls had opened the window and were climbing in.

"YUUUKI!" Minami yelled in a two-faced sounding voice. Her eyes glistened a reddish colour as her arms extended like rubber and wrapped around her lover boy. Mr. Man shrieked.

"Ah!"

Minami laughed as the other fan girls jumped through the window also. They all had strange looking costume things. But they weren't made out of spandex. How mortifying.

"We've been sent here," Minami cackled, "To put an end to MR. MAN AND SIDEKICK BOB!"

"Yeah!" Mia agreed, shaking her fist threateningly, "And even though we love you so, we have to rid the world of you, so evil can take over!"

Sidekick Bob, on the other hand, was feeling a bit depressed; where was his fanclub, huh? He crossed his arms and sat on the table, waiting. But the wait didn't last long, for his own groupies knocked down the door with a clang. He yelped ad swiveled around, just as a pair of giant rubbery hands grabbed him and sealed him up against Mr. Man's back.

"These girls seem to be made of rubber!" Mr. Man chocked out as Sidekick Bob's back nudged up against his.

"Yeah, I noticed," Sidekick Bob groaned as the crazy girl squeezed his stomach harder, "But what exactly are we supposed to do? There's nothing we CAN do! Rubber is like… I don't know… rubber? We can't defeat these girls!"

Mr. Man thought for a moment. Maybe they were like most girls, except man-eating; maybe they hated insults.

"Well," Mr. Man gasped out, "I wonder why Minami and Chihiro are doing all the work! Maybe because the rest of your girls are HOPELESS!"

The fanclub girls growled ferally. It seemed Mr. Man had only made the situation worse. His fanclub girl's extendable arms were rapping around him like giant snakes; which hurt. Sidekick Bob glared over at him, as the rest of his fanclub girl's hands grew larger and started reaching for this throat. He coughed out some random insulting words, before his air way closed.

Mr. Man watched at Sidekick Bob's breathing became ragged. What was he supposed to do. Having his hands plastered to his legs and his throat also being enclosed, it seemed there was nothing either of them could do.

Had their fate finally been sealed?

**A/N:**

**Gasp! This is absolutely evil, I have to say.**

**Oh well… I wonder if I'll let them perish…**

**Oh, right. Chihiro is just a random name, since I don't know who that girl from manga 17 is, the one who created the Kyo fanclub. **


	9. Not so bad after all

**A/N:**

**Viva la Gaspos!**

**Are our favourite hero's about to perish… perishably? **

**Unlikely! Mr. Man and Sidekick Bob wont go down without a fight!**

Sidekick Bob was fully unconscious now, as his air supply had been cut off. Mr. Man was close to joining him in sleepy land, when he had a brilliant idea. Of course, if it weren't for the bright colours on Sidekick Bob's spandex costume, the idea would have never come to mind, so he gets credit too.

Mr. Man thought for a moment; if the bad comments about the girls wouldn't stop them, there was only one thing that would. Clashing colours. Mr. Man realized that the reason these girls wore no spandex, is because it only comes in ugly, clashing colours, such as red and purple, or black and white.

If Mr. Man recalled properly, there was a few stitches loose on Sidekick Bob's spandex. He growled, before moving himself as far as he could to the piece of fabric on Sidekick Bob's arm. Yanking, the fabric came off with ease. He threw it at Minami.

"Eww! Minami! You have clashing colours!" Mia screamed, when she noticed the purple and red piece of spandex on her friends head. Minami screeched and ran around in circles. Mr. Man laughed.

"Well, well," He said, because Minami had let go of his throat, "It seems you ARE defeatable!"

Mr. Man kicked the girl who was still holding on to him in the shin and ran to Sidekick Bob's side, where he threw some more spandex on the girls. They screamed also and fell into boiling heaps of cotton.

"Can we go to class now?" Sidekick Bob mumbled under his breath, still not properly around yet. Yuki (who'd changed back) whispered a reply before punching Kyo in the stomach (he'd transformed back, too). He spluttered.

"H-Hey! I was just d-dying and now your kickin' me? What the frick!"

"We have to go to class, stupid cat," Yuki said with a wink and helped his cousin up. Kyo shoved Yuki in return before running away. He smirked as he ran, proud that he had been able to help Yuki in some way when their lives were in danger. Kyo looked up in the nick of time to see the set of lockers he ran face first into.

**A/N:**

**Very short, I know!**

**JUST HEAR ME OUT, DAMMIT!**

**I just wanted to end the suspence before I started a new evil villain person thingy.**

**Okay?**

**Okay then.**


	10. End of the Dynamic Duo

**A/N:**

**So, we've come to the end of Mr. Man and Sidekick Bob, huh?**

**Well, that's angsty. I quite enjoyed this story.**

"Yuki?"

Yuki hadn't been feeling good. He didn't know what was going on. It felt as if his body had been turned upside down and inside out a few hundred times. And that IS bad people. Unless you're on a twirly, whirly roller coaster. Then its okay.

"What is it, Kyo?"

Kyo had come down with a fever and decided to tell Yuki. Just incase he cared the slightest bit.

"I feel sick,"

"I do too! Don't try at suck up to me!" Yuki snapped, whilst turning around in the spinning chair at his desk. He pulled to a halt and stood up.

"Ya know what?"

Kyo didn't know what. He didn't know much, as a matter of fact. How sad.

"I think we've lost our powers."

Well, Kyo wasn't exactly happy about that! He was shocked and appalled. He had saved the world so many times! He didn't want to stop feeling special now. As a matter of fact, it was the only time he felt special.

"…No! You're wrong!"

Yuki wasn't wrong. The powers had been sucked from them both and thrown into the trash like a lousy, piece of crap. Although, they weren't crap. They were one step up from crap. CURSED. Wah, I'm kidding! (dodges rocks).

"Well, we may as well pack it up here, Kyo. No more crime fighting for us. I guess it was fun while it lasted. Let's go tell Shigure and Tohru of our adventures!" Yuki suggested happily. Too happily. Kyo became scared.

"I'm-"

"Scared? Y-Yeah…me too…"

They wandered down the stairs and sat at the table solemnly. Tohru eyed them.

"Wow," Tohru said, amazed. "You both look as if you've just been nice to each other!"

"We have a story to tell!" Yuki announced, clapping his hands and ignoring Tohru.

"Yeah! So listen!" Added Kyo, because he always adds in stuff. Like fish to Tohru's home made biscuit recipe.

"We were…"

"MR. MAN AND SIDEKICK BOB!" Kyo yelled really loudly, waving his hands. Yuki also waved his hands and began to sway.

"As if!" Shigure chuckled. "You two? Famous superhero's! You can't even get along, let alone work together to defeat crime!"

"I agree with Shigure…" Tohru sighed. "I'm sorry!"

Yuki and Kyo gasped. How come they wouldn't believe them? Yuki tried to persuade them.

"Shigure, Miss Honda, we're serious! Look at the pictures in the newspaper! It looks like us! How many people have silver and ginger hair in the world?"

Shigure cocked his head to the side. "Lots,"

Kyo and Yuki sweat dropped. Maybe this was something that was best left a secret. It wasn't like anyone would believe them anyway.

**A/N:**

**Well, thanks for reading and reviewing. **

**See you next time, hopefully!**


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